The Swindler's Graph

 "A Math Memoir- Series" 

At elementary school, the math teacher was a dignified, good-looking man in his fifties. He wore sunglasses and dressed neatly, but he was a swindler.

PhD in Trickery Engineering

His facial expressions were always so serious, as if he was on a top-secret mission that no one else could possibly handle. He used to convince us to attend his private lessons because he (arrogantly says) not only knows the exam but also participates in its preparation.

“Because I want you to get the best grades”, he says seriously and respectfully as if he is talking to his peers, “I will pass the questions to you, and help you to answer it”. 

The exam - back in our days, around the mid-nineties, was set at the level of the governorate, and the venerable swindler was hinting that he was among the best mathematics teachers in the governorate. 

Because of my hatred of mathematics, back at these days, and my very bad grades, I was constantly attending his private lessons, trying to get out of my miserable attempts to get better grades.

The Magic Mark

In the final year exam, he told us, during school time, that whoever attends his private lesson that day, will be able to know a secret that guarantees success. The secret was a little mark we must put on the exam’s answer sheet, so that he, and his tribe, surely sees it, and verily we will get a better grade. “Al-A'raf (7:27)”

Later after-noon that day, I was among those who believingly listen to him, he told us that the mark is the letter “و” in Arabic, that we must put it exactly where the “x” and “y” axis meets, in our answer to the graph question. “No doubt, the graph question will be the last question in the exam,” he said waving his hand sharply in an emphatic sign “there is no talk after that”. And we left happily that day, but the next day, the exam had no graph question.

The rank Of life and Coins

Mr. Ibrahim Amer, and this is his name, used to divide the students who attended his private lessons into two different groups, each group had its own pricing. There is the “distinguished group” (ten pounds per month or week, I don’t really remember) and there is the “regular group” for sons and daughters of the poor, with only five pounds. I was attending the regular group; the five-pound, and I remember that one day I had a math question that I could not solve. After the private lesson ended, I went to him “Sir, would you please help me solving this question, I have tried many times, but I don’t understand”, I asked him. He looked at the question “No, my dear, this question belongs to the distinguished group, join them and pay the difference, and only then I will be able to help you.”, he replied approaching me with smile as he was giving me a favor.

I still remember my conflicted feelings at that moment, I was confused between his attempt to get closer and gently to me, so I join the other group, because it is the only right thing to do in the world, and the feeling of his rejection because I do not deserve his support yet. I felt the necessity of doing one specific thing, which was to pay him money, so that he would accept me among his favorite students.

Of course, during school class he would solve only one question on the board in a quick manner, and then he spends the rest of the class joking with his favorite students or talking with his fellow teachers.

Like any swindler, he was soft-spoken, had a privileged place among teachers, and had his followers. And his closest follower, of course, was Mr. Ahmed Bayoumi, who, although, used to follow his approach with a ruler, but he did not announce a distinct study group. We, his private students, were attending his private lessons in a dreary classroom in an old semi-deserted school, and Mr. Bayoumi would gather us in one class, just as vegetables are gathered in a huge burlap bag, to give us the lesson at once and for all, instead of dividing us into smaller groups. In this way, he finishes his schedule quickly.

The strange thing I remember, is that almost all the students in the school class, at the normal school, would move to the far deserted school, to sit in an almost dark class, in front of the same teacher, to get the same knowledge they supposed to have a few hours ago, in the normal class, at a better school condition.